


Unsay

by Nisushi



Series: Nikki's Hidekane week [2]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Angst, Confessions, Fluff, Hidekane Week 2018, M/M, use of alcohol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-24
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-06-15 00:29:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15400974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nisushi/pseuds/Nisushi
Summary: Hidekane week 2018 day 2 - Sloppy emotional texts.Kaneki has never seen his only-roommate in another way than that. That is, until one night he gets some very peculiar messages from his roommate.





	Unsay

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even remember what my original idea for this prompt was but I guess this was a nice idea to work out. Also, they were roommates. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Kaneki always left his phone’s sound on. Not that anyone ever messaged or called him, but Kaneki didn’t want to be the one who never replied or picked up. It was all about politeness, unnecessary as his phone would only make noise once in a while.

Maybe that was why his attention went from his laptop screen to his phone immediately after the thing had vibrated. It was early in the morning, and Kaneki had made himself comfortable for an all-nighter, bundled up in blankets and having an unhealthy amount of coffee cans sitting on his desk. It was to meet the deadlines of his end thesis, and he had planned to keep his eyes on the screen for the rest of the night, but his phone didn’t allow it.

Kaneki rubbed his eyes. He would have to get glasses soon if he kept up this bad habit of spending nights staring at his laptop in total darkness. A pity that he didn’t really care. Only if he could finish that stupid paper…

His phone vibrated again, and it took a second for Kaneki to decide that there was enough time this night to continue his work and that he deserved a small break. He let the blankets drop on the floor and slumped towards the kitchen where he had left his phone.

The messages could either come from his work, his project partner, or his roommate. When Kaneki unlocked his phone, he saw that both came from the last one.

 

H. Nagachika: _Hei babe_

H. Nagachika: _Im dyin without yoy_

 

Kaneki frowned, read the text messages again, and frowned even more when he realised that he had read it correctly the first time. His roommate, Hideyoshi Nagachika, was supposed to be at some friends gathering. At least that’s what he had told Kaneki when he left.

Hide was, to put it lightly, special. When they first met at the beginning of this year, Kaneki felt heavily intimidated by Hide when he sat one foot into the apartment while he was unpacking. Later Kaneki realised that it wasn’t all too bad and that there was no need to call the landlord and beg for another apartment. Hide was just a little overwhelming, expressive. Everything Kaneki wasn’t.

Other than living together, they were nothing. They shared one class at the university, but that was it. Hide did international studies while Kaneki busied himself with literature. Hide was out most the time, helping at committees or hanging out with his friends, while Kaneki preferred to stay at home and avoid as much social interaction as he could. They didn’t work, were complete opposites, so Kaneki could say they weren’t friends. Just a roommate who sometimes was using the bathroom at the wrong time.

Looking back at the messages, Kaneki debated if he should reply. This was for someone else to read, he was sure about it. It was probably for the giggly brunette who came to sleep over last week. Kaneki had to make breakfast for her because Hide told him she loved pancakes and that his were the best. He dully thought about how much Hide could get out of a supposedly one-night stand.

 

K. Kaneki: _Hide, I think you got the wrong number._

 

He wanted to put it beside him, put his phone back on the table, and continue his work, but almost immediately after he had hit send he got a text back.

 

H. Nagachika: _Kanekiiii_

H. Nagachika: _Why so cold???_

Hide knew who he was talking to. It confused Kaneki more, and he tried to figure out why Hide would send him this. His roommate barely sent him anything, only if he was at the supermarket and asked him if he needed anything or if he lost his key again. Hide never joked with him, so this came as a surprise. How was he supposed to react to this?

 

H. Nagachika: _Kanekkii you feli asleep????_

K. Kaneki: _Did you drink?_

_Well, obviously Ken._ Hide did occasionally go to parties, and with those parties came alcohol more often than not. Plus, even for Hide’s standard these texts were too much.

 

H. Nagachika: _Just a littel_

K. Kaneki: _Please don’t do anything stupid._

H. Nagachika: _Kanki help mee Im really seriousllsy dyinge_

K. Kaneki: _How so?_

 

Kaneki looked at the time. It was three in the morning, time to get back to work. He weirdly felt disappointed when he tried to drag himself towards his workspace. Kaneki was actually having fun. Maybe he could slack off just a little longer…

 

H. Nagachika: _im soo lognely Kanekij_

H. Nagachika: _Ill die and I think ill never see u again_

Leaning back onto the table, Kaneki chuckled. He pictured Hide at some party that was getting emptier, people leaving and Hide staying behind. It was a funny sight.

 

K. Kaneki: _I don’t think it’s that bad._

H. Nagachika: _Nooo for realz these are the lsat words im gonna say to u_

H. Nagachika: _But dont tell Nishiki about it cause heell get jealous_

H. Nagachika: _ur cute_

 

That was a bad word choice if Hide really thought that this was the end. Almost an anti-climax even. But the frown returned as soon as it hit him. Why was his roommate calling him cute?

 

K. Kaneki: _Thank you?_

H. Nagachika: _Noooo ur deff not takin this seriously but its serious I thought u were cute frome the day uwere unpakcing ur books pls believe me_

H. Nagachika: _Maybe I even like u but im not sure_

H. Nagachika: _no thats not tru I love you_

 

Was this a joke? There was no way Kaneki could take this seriously. Kaneki didn’t know Hide well enough to be sure if he was just playing with him or if he was a guy who wouldn’t joke about this. Hide wouldn’t right? Then again, he was definitely drunk.

 

K. Kaneki: _Is that a joke?_

H. Nagachika: _IM not!!!_

H. Nagachika: _Im cryin for real now and only cause I love u_

H. Nagachika: _U would see my teares if you were here and you would belief me because I rlley think ur beatiful and I loveyou_

 

Kaneki could only stare at his phone for a minute. Hide stayed silent, and that was good. This went too fast, was too much for him. He didn’t want to assume anything, because Hide wasn’t himself at the moment. Or was he and was everything he wrote true? It messed up Kaneki’s mind, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to continue work now. Nothing followed his expectations tonight.

His phone made a sound again. Kaneki hastily read what Hide had send him.

 

H. Nagachika: _Im sorry please dont hate me_

 

Even if it wasn’t real and Hide was playing him or one of his friends had gotten into his phone or he had lost a bet, the text broke Kaneki’s heart a little. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to come over as a loser if he comforted him and this was all a joke, but neither did he want to be a jerk who didn’t listen to Hide when he needed it. Not that that was true. Right?

He decided to play along.

  
K. Kaneki: _You don’t have to feel sorry._  
  
H. Nagachika: _Ur makin me the most happiest man on earth_

 

He should just stop this, ask Hide to come home or just go to sleep. It was funny at first, but now it was getting too real. It was not like he didn’t feel flattered. Did he feel flattered? 

 

K. Kaneki: _Can you get home safely Hide?_

 

Did he hope Hide wasn’t kidding? Why was he hoping? He shouldn’t be hoping for God’s sake!

 

H. Nagachika: _Please come and get me._

 

Why didn’t he hesitate to pull on his jacket, put on his shoes, and run out of the door? Why did he feel warm when Hide asked him to come?

This night had its peculiar ways of working out.

 

The streets were almost empty when Kaneki brought Hide back their apartment, only were there some wasted businessmen lingering. Hide fit in perfectly, as he was half hanging on Kaneki who tried to support him with all his might. With one arm slung over Kaneki’s shoulders and Kaneki holding his waist, they would get home eventually. It would have been easier if Hide’s feet would actually do their work. Kaneki was afraid the next time Hide stumbled over them, they would both go down.

When Kaneki had ran out of the apartment, he actually had to stop again to ask Hide where he was staying. He didn’t want to admit that he may have been a little too overenthusiastic. He just wanted to get back to work soon. Maybe.

Fortunately, it was Nishiki’s place where Hide had spent the evening. It wasn’t far from his own place and it wouldn’t be too awkward to get Hide as he knew Nishiki. Unfortunately, it was Nishiki’s place where Hide had spent the evening, and the older one didn’t show any mercy in rubbing in everything Hide had said that night from the moment Kaneki stepped into the apartment. High chance this wasn’t the end either. Kaneki could still feel his face burning.

Hide started babbling halfway. It was nothing but incoherent mumbling at first, and Kaneki silently wished Hide would put the energy into actual walking instead of keeping making sounds.

‘’Sorry, what were you saying?’’

Laughing softly at Hide putting his all into forming a sentence, Kaneki turned his head towards Hide, closer so he could hear him. For the first time Kaneki noticed the small freckles on Hide’s face. They were light and non-existent if you didn’t come this close. And Kaneki thought about how it made Hide so real, so natural, and how he wanted to come closer more often so he could look at them more. Hide was really pretty.

‘’Want to eat your pancakes again.’’ Hide’s voice wasn’t slurred for a moment and it startled Kaneki out of glancing at Hide’s face. He turned away quickly, wanting to hit himself for being such a weirdo. That wasn’t normal for only-roommates to do to each other.

‘’I’ll make you some tomorrow morning.’’ He was already looking forward to baking them while a dead tired Hide would make his way to the smell of the warm pancakes. Maybe they could work out.

‘’Thanks ‘Neki, you’re the best. Ever told you that?’’

‘’You have. Multiple times.’’ A small pang was what Kaneki felt when he reminded himself that Hide would probably have forgotten everything by tomorrow. He just hoped the messages wouldn’t embarrass him too much. He was going to tell Hide that he didn’t mind tomorrow. He had fun for the first time in so long.

‘’I’ll say it again,’’ Hide pointed one finger at Kaneki’s face, almost in a threatening way lightly pushing into Kaneki’s cheek. That cheek burned up again. Kaneki wanted to turn away.

‘’You’re awesome and I wished we’d hang out more.’’ He didn’t want to hope. Hide was going to forget this all and everything would go back to normal tomorrow. He absolutely didn’t want to think that maybe what Hide was saying was true.

‘’That’s okay Hide.’’

‘’Are you scared of me?’’ Hide suddenly sounded so serious and Kaneki stopped walking. If this night continued attacking him like this, he would die young.

‘’Wha- What kind of question is-‘’

‘’Be honest. I don’t want you to be scared of me.’’ This was the second time that Hide came so close, but this time Kaneki noticed the watery eyes instead of the freckles. Hide was definitely an emotional drunk.

Kaneki was aware that Hide wanted an answer. Kaneki wasn’t scared of Hide, not really, but…

‘’I’m scared of other things.’’ Of how he felt so different with Hide now, of how he got sucked into this slight false hope, of how disappointed he would feel tomorrow. Of how this would all end. ‘’But not of you.’’

Hide’s grip on his shoulder strengthened, and they started walking again. They didn’t talk on the whole way back to the apartment.

 

‘’Hide, sit down.’’ Kaneki slowly lowered Hide on their floor so he could close their door and get Hide’s shoes off. Hide leaned half asleep against the wall with his mouth open. It was quiet in the apartment, even Hide eventually stopped making noises to spare the silence. Kaneki hadn’t felt so calm in ages, and he still had the thought of the paper in the back of his mind.

Kaneki took Hide’s arm again and put it over his shoulders. ‘’Hide, stand up please.’’ His legs were tired from dragging Hide all the way here, shaking as he tried to pull both Hide and himself up.

Together they stumbled through the apartment to Hide’s bedroom. As always, it was a mess that gave a lived-in impression. Hide began to walk on his own, like he sensed he was close to his bed. And he decided to take Kaneki to bed too.

They fell on Hide’s bed, legs still on the ground and Hide fast asleep. It made Kaneki wonder how many times Hide had fallen asleep like this. He should check on him after nights of going out from now on.

Kaneki slowly freed himself from Hide’s arm, and Hide frowned a little in his sleep. Kaneki wanted to immediately get back next to Hide, but he knew he shouldn’t. It would be too much of a mess if he stayed here. So he just took Hide’s legs and lay his body properly on the bed.

Should he undress Hide? The clothes had smelled musky when they were walking home, and besides that he didn’t want Hide to suffocate in his sleep. Then again, how many times had Hide fallen asleep like this?

Kaneki’s hands itched to do something, but he stared at Hide’s form for a while instead. He began to work when he decided that he wouldn’t be able to sleep if he left Hide like this. It couldn’t be helped right?

He turned Hide on his back and wasted no time to pull his shirt over his head. Next stop was unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants down and off so Hide was only wearing his boxers. Kaneki tried to give Hide as much privacy as possible, quickly searching for a laundry basket. Did Hide even own one?

In the end, Kaneki folded up the clothes and put them on the pile of not so fresh smelling clothes that lay on the ground.

Somewhere in the bundle of covers, Kaneki found a red T-shirt that Kaneki knew was Hide’s sleeping shirt. He probably had never washed the thing since Kaneki saw him drinking coffee in that thing every single morning, but when Kaneki took it between his hands, it only smelled of Hide. It made him want to look at his freckles again.

Kaneki was forced to look at Hide’s naked figure when he wanted to get him into that shirt. The first thing he noticed was that Hide was pretty tan. He knew that already from Hide’s face and how it was compared Kaneki’s ghostly pale skin, but this was different in some way. There was more skin, and Kaneki almost thought he could feel it radiating warmth even from a distance. Kaneki really wanted to touch it.

Hide was not skinny, Kaneki could almost say he was nicely toned. Especially his legs, strong and healthy. Kaneki understood how Hide was so popular with women. He was pretty-looking, handsome even.

‘’Let’s get you dressed up.’’ Kaneki wanted to get this done quickly so he could hide away in his bedroom for the rest of the night, week. How could he think such things about his only-roommate? He should be ashamed of himself.

He put the covers over Hide’s body after he was done with the shirt. Before he would go, he came close to Hide’s face once again. He wanted to take one last look at the freckles.

That look took a long time. Kaneki almost fell asleep, squatted next to Hide’s bed with his head on his crossed arms laying on the bed. It was calming, Hide was calming, and Kaneki wanted to get to know him better. But that wouldn’t do, they just didn’t work out.

When he wanted to leave, Hide murmured something. Kaneki came closer, leaning over Hide’s face to be able to hear him.

‘’Thank you.’’ A light kiss was left on the corner of Kaneki’s lips.

How was he supposed to forget this like Hide?

**Author's Note:**

> Go check out my [Tumblr](http://nitsuki-baka.tumblr.com)!


End file.
